Arthur Knapp-shappey - interrogation specialist
by Brown hair and eyes
Summary: "Mum, there's a Pirate! In the cabin! He wants me to use my learning-to-understand-people skills to talk to people." How Arthur got recuited by a certain covert organisation.
1. Chapter 1

Arthur Knapp-shappey - interrogation specialist  
AN: I wrote this, I hope everyone's in charecter and I hope you enjoy!

"Mum, there's a Pirate! In the cabin! With an eye-patch and a great coat and an american accent and everything. In our cabin!"  
"What does he want?" Caroyln sighed.  
"He wants me to use my learning-to-understand-people skills to talk to people. As a proper job, not just for fun!"  
"What!"  
"I know; it's brilliant!"

"So, to get this clear, you want to employ _my_ son, a man for whom half-wit is a kind exaggeration and who often _falls over_ when he _lies_ to work in an interrogation department in some hair-brained _covert _organisation who's name makes MJN sound like the pinnacle of professionalism and ability."  
"Yes." the man stared back at Carolyn seemingly unaffected by the sarcasm and disbelief in her voice.  
"Do I wish to know why? No, thinking about it, probably not. Fine. You want him and he seems enthusiastic about it, even more so than usual. But I will negotiate his pay and working hours. _I_ will not let my son accept a year's supply of toblerones."

"Hi chaps! This is Mr-"  
"Classified."  
"Really because I thought your name was-"  
"Arthur, Classified."  
"What do you mean classified- Oh. Oh! _Classified!_ Right." He attempted to wink, an action that caused the observers to flinch. "Well, this is Skip and Douglas. This is Mr... Classified. He's kind of a bit my boss. I mean, I suppose Mum is my boss too but she hasn't got an eye-patch or a parrot... We should all get eye-patches!"  
"What do you mean? Why is he your boss?" Martin questioned confusedly.  
"Well, remember that I went on that understanding-people course in-"  
"In Ipswich, yes I do."  
"Well it turns out that in some ways I'm actually quite good at talking to people or sometimes _at_ them, they're _really_ surprised when I do that. So I talk to them and they talk to me and Mr Classified uses that to help other people. Apparently I'm quite good at being a person that people don't mind talking with! And sometimes if the doctors think some people need it I talk to other workers too. It's actually quite fun."


	2. Chapter 2

A dicussion between pilots  
AN: This chapter is set roughly halfway through chapter 1. Hope you enjoy.

"So, what do you think?"

"So, what do I think, what?"

"You know."

"My illustrious captain, the things I know are manifold but alas without the aid of telepathy- a skill I am yet to master-"

"About Arthur's new job."

"Go on."

"Well, I mean, it's a bit suspicious isn't it? MJN air being in trouble-"

"Such an astonishing change from status quo!"

"-in _more_ trouble than normal, Carolyn seriously considering pulling the plug. Then suddenly Arthur's getting a new job, Arthur, a technicality is discovered in the small print and bibbity bobbity boo MJN air is in the black for once!"

"And you're concerned because _we're_ being kept in the dark?" Douglas quirked an eyebrow.

Martin sighed. "I don't know. It's just seems rather odd you know?"

"So you think Arthur's joined, what, the Mafia!"

"Goodness no! But he doesn't really talk about it."

"He's been talking about it ever since."

"Yes, but it's all about the coffee machine they have there and his colleagues' pets names, not what they do or who they are or where they work..."

Douglas paused and thought about his last couple of trips.

"Martin, I believe you're _right._" A silence fell between the pilots as they contemplated this revelation.

"So what do you think he's doing then that _Arthur_ wants to keep secret?"

"Well anything technical is out, working for his father perhaps – no Carolyn wouldn't let it come for that, not even for MJN."

"Maybe he's a superhero and has some sort of... secret identity. He has the temperament for it."

"I didn't know superheroing paid so well. If so I might have reconsidered my career choice- fame, money-"

"Lycra outfits?"

"Perhaps not. Acting maybe? No."

"A spy?"

"You're really scrapping the barrel here aren't you?"

"Well, you don't know either!"

"Coffee chaps! Oh, is something wrong? Do you need me to Listen about it? I'm quite good at it you know."

"No thank you Arthur, it's okay. What do you do? In your new job, I mean."

"Oh this and that. Are we nearly there yet?"

"No; we've still got three hours of Russia still to go."


End file.
